WHO'S WHO
Lately, the Bush team -- especially Rumsfeld and Cheney -- has been having a lot of trouble telling Osama Bin Laden and Saddam Hussein apart. Here's a little aid to help them out:
 OSAMA BIN LADEN |
 SADDAM HUSSEIN |
|
| Religion | Staunch Wahabbi fundamentalist | Non-practicing Muslim |
| Country of Origin | Saudi Arabia | Iraq |
| Link to 9/11 | Mastermind, recruiter and financier | None |
| Stance on WMDs | Desperately seeking to use against the U.S. | Sold anything resembling a WMD for scrap metal years ago |
| Principal occupation since 2000 | Fomenting hatred, brutality, random slaughter in name of Allah | Writing romance novels |
| Residence on eve of U.S. invasion of Iraq | Cave in Tora Bora | Palace in Baghdad |
| Relationship to CIA | Anti-Soviet proxy fighter | Puppet dictator and keeper of the peace |
| Relationship to other countries | Father-in-law to Taliban's Mullah Omar | Business partner with France and Russia on lucrative oil contracts -- which explains why those nations wanted me to stay put |
| Threat to U.S. interests on eve of Iraqi invasion | Great, since the same Marines that could have killed mem in Tora Bora were diverted to Iraq | Slim, since gave up WMD programs years ago |
| Would vote for | Bush. Hey, the guy's letting me stay in power -- why not do the same for him? | Kerry. He understands that me and my people didn't have anything to do with 9/11. |
—Greg Olear
Editor, LARGEREGO
September 28, 2004
Editor, LARGEREGO
September 28, 2004
"We are a nation in danger." |